hanan.

My man, he keeps giving me reassurance. Something that my anxiety constantly needs. My heart feels soothed after getting his constant reassurance for me. Thank you for loving me. I hope all my past pain does not remain in my heart and wash away the thought of him loving me. I want to be only surrounded by lots of love from him until I forget everything that makes my heart so heavy and bring me down. I hope the pain, the burden, and the heavy feeling in my heart will continue to disappear and I will never have to carry and bear it again. I love you so much. Thank you 😊

I'm so happy!! Finally, I continue writing like my psychiatrist told me during my last appointment last year. So sad that I could not continue my psychiatrist appointment due to some reasons 😓 I just leave my mental health issues to Allah 😭 The first thing I write is about my man. He deserves the whole world. I hope I will keep writing and let out whatever is in my heart, hehe.

Irfan keeps asking me to enter U*A too which is quite sweet and funny 😆  He said if I am in AIK*L with him we will sit together beside each other but since U*A separates seating between girls and guys, I will be seating at the end of the girls' seating and he will sit at the end of the guys' seating but we will sit beside each other. My man is so cute. I said, if he wanted it that way he should ask me earlier during my UPU application after SPM to take the same course with him, but it was too late. He didn't approach me yet during that time anyway. We didn't know each other yet during that time. My man recently brought me to eat cendol after he accompanied me to ask for a job vacancy at one clinic near my house, but we just tapau since he borrowed his friend's car and his friend wanna use it later. Just his action of him bringing me to buy cendol already makes me so happy. I'm really grateful for my man that already been with me for 5 years. I love him.

Memories are hurtful,when we know that we will never get it back. In my 19 years of my life, of course i have a lot of memories. Very a lot. All kind of memories of different people. In life, i met a lot of people which they may have been my sources of happiness in my life. The question is, will they forever be? Therefore, all the episodes in my blog, i will try to recall back all the memories that I've had that have  made me into me, new me, current me. All the sweet  and bitter memories, hurtful or wonderful, for sure some will bring me into tears and some will bring me into smile and joy :')